He wakes up from his nap with sleep lingering in the form of lines
impressed on his cheeks. Eyes puffy yet refreshed, his pajama bottoms
mismatched with his t-shirt I dressed him in when he woke up this
morning. His bare feet giving way to chubby baby toes. His snuggles and
kisses and sweet, sleepy smile.
It's been the same for a while now, but something made me slow down and really see. Something made me stop and notice these small things that most people would probably not see, let alone find themselves with a smile creeping across their face, their heart full. But I found myself in that place recently. Staring at my little man who is growing so fast. Time stood still for a moment long enough for me to capture him and soak him up. These little things matter to me because I'm his Mama. But if I'm not careful, I can miss a whole lot of these moments because I'm living a hurried life or I'm only looking for the "big" moments to remember, milestones like climbing and potty training and learning to ride a bike.
Isn't that true for all of us, mamas? If we're not careful to really see our babies and what is unique about them, we can miss out on a lot. If we're not intentional about slowing down and taking the time to notice the little things, we'll miss out on the sacred of motherhood, the God-sized moments packed into our pint-sized humans. God delights in us, big and small, and as mamas, we have the chance to catch the same glimpse as we watch the babies we've been entrusted with, slowing down to delight in them. We won't just see the big things, but we'll begin to notice all the tiny treasures wrapped up in our babies, each one hand-crafted by the One who hung the moon and the stars.
I admit that slowing down is not easy for me. I spend a lot of time hurrying and doing and not enough time seeing and sitting. But that's not the kind of mama I want to be. I want to slow down. I want to be intentional. I want to see and remember and, someday, be able to look back with joy (and not regret), able to recall all the wonderful, wild and beautiful pieces that make up this thing called motherhood.
So, today, because time is all too fleeting, I choose to slow down to see and remember:
- the way you ask for the "vac" (vacuum) each day, and then pretend that you're cleaning just like me. You move the chairs and floor rugs out of your way. You're very serious about this task.
- the way you wake up from your nap with sleep lines on your cheeks, your mismatched pj bottoms and bare feet and want to rock and snuggle with your blanket.
- the way you prefer for me to put you down for naps and Daddy to tuck you in at night.
- how you don't care what we're playing with, as long as we're doing it together.
- how much you love balloons. You delight in the simple things.
- how much you love (whip) cream and sprinkles.
- the way you sit quietly in your chair and get lost in your books.
- how you never run out of energy, loved to be chased and think it's pretty funny when someone pops out from behind a door at you.
- the way your hair and skin smell after a bath.
- that your favorite activities right now are building towers and making traffic jams with your cars.
- your courageous spirit. Oh, how fearless you are.
- your determination and independence.
- your sweetness and the way you shower me with hugs and kisses.
- how you prefer to be sitting in my lap or right next to me when we have a whole room to share.
- your patience as you wait in line at story time for stamps on your hands, not pushing to get to the front.
- they way you put your empty dish in the sink after a snack.
- how quickly you learn through music/song and your love for dancing and singing.
- how proud you are of your accomplishments, whether it's finishing your meal, singing along to a song or catching a ball.
- that we share butterfly kisses, all three of us, every night.
- how you have started to ask for one more kiss before bed.
- your fascination with diggers, fire trucks, police cars and other things that go.
- how you want to drive like Daddy and me, and are thrilled to shop with me at Food Lion where you can sit in a race car grocery cart.
- how sitting on the potty just means another place to read lots of books.
- the way you sing and chat when you first wake up, but not until you've pressed the belly of your seahorse to make him sing.
- how you squeal with delight when you are free to run, inside or out.
- how you love to help... unloading the dishwasher, putting clean clothes in the basket to be folded, sweeping the floors with your little broom... anything to be like a grown up.
- the way you like for Daddy to wrap your bath towel around you, tucking it in so that you can walk rather than be carried to get your pajamas on. You are so proud of the big boy you are becoming.
- how you like to tickle your nose on soft things... blankets, pillows, stuffed animals, doggy tails.
- that you still love to play peek-a-boo.
- how you are learning to say prayers.
- how sharp your memory is becoming. You can recall certain things when we go past or to places you have been before.
- how you are able to play independently while I cook or do some chores. I love to listen to you talk to yourself and the toys that you are playing with.
- how you grab my pots and pans while I'm cooking and pretend to cook on your play kitchen.
- how quickly you can take out all of your toys and scatter them everywhere.
- your focus when you color/create.
- the way you say "I love you".
- and how you name family members every day as if to ask where they are and when you will see them again.
Holy Father, thank You for the way You delight in me. You are the
Giver of all good gifts. Thank You for Your handiwork. Thank You for
Your grace that has kept me from missing out on delighting in my child
and for all of the wrapped up treasures You have placed in him for me to
uncover. Your goodness knows no end.
